#9 Diarrhea

Despite the fact that the majority of food-borne illness results from contaminated meat, meat people still love meat.

In fact, contaminated meat is so prevalent that meat people are advised by the US government to carefully cook all meat, so as to kill the bacteria present in the feces within the meat product.

Meat people love their meat so much they are willing to eat shit to have it.

Not only are they willing to eat shit for their meat, they are also willing to get the shits for their meat. Contaminants like salmonella, e coli, and other dangerous bacteria and toxins found in meat can produce diarrhea in adults (and can have much worse consequences for children, the sick, and the elderly).

Moreover, the Standard American Diet (SAD), which is high in meat, doesn't contain enough fiber to keep the stools of meat people nice and firm, thus resulting in diarrhea. SAD meat people need more fiber.

If you ever have to buy a meat person a gift, consider getting them a fiber-rich fruit basket.