#23 The Taste of Power

Apparently meat-eaters sense of taste is related to their desire to dominate or to support unequal power structures. They like the taste of power.

Meat-eaters prefer the taste of things they are told are meat, even when they aren't actually meat.

"[A] large group of people were given a 'human values' test which seeks to measure fifty six different values (loyalty, ambition, social order, etc.) Then, the subjects were asked to rate a variety of sausages. People who scored high on 'social authority' - they believed it was important to support people in power - tended to label the 'vegetarian' sausage as inferior, even when the vegetarian sausage was actually from a cow." (source)

They must actually like the idea of eating dead animals. Humans are animals, too, you know? So just watch your back when you're around meat people.

#22 Ignoring Intention

Wesley J. Smith is just one example of many people who make the assumption that intent doesn't matter when it comes to killing animals. He wrote:
"Plant agriculture results each year in the mass slaughter of countless animals, including rabbits, gophers, mice, birds, snakes, and other field creatures. These animals are killed during harvesting, and in the various mechanized farming processes that produce wheat, corn, rice, soybeans, and other staples of vegan diets."

To him, and countless others, it's all the same. Killing is killing and intent doesn't matter.

Someone dies. So what if you didn't pull the trigger? You were there. Then you're guilty of murder! So what if you called 911? So what if it was an accident? So what if he had a food allergy neither of you knew about? So what if he died of natural causes? None of it matters. Intent, context, history... none of it matters. Dead is dead.

Obviously, it's ridiculous to act as though it's OK to eat meat simply because most plant farming results in some unintended animal killing. There's a BIG difference between intentionally killing animals for food and unintentionally killing animals for food. There is a big difference between a) breeding, raising, and slaughtering animals in order to eat them and b) accidentally killing wild animals during the process of harvesting plants. Intent matters.

But meat people don't care. They don't like logic, reason, or thinking clearly. They just like meat. So they'll use any excuse in the book to defend their clearly immoral decision to eat animals.

#21 Whining About Their "Rights"

"Animal-rights supporters seem to care about animals to the exclusion of people."
Meat people tend to say this, especially when animal advocates object to something the meat peep wants to do. It doesn't really make sense. It's much like a claim that women's rights come at the expense of men's rights or that rights for people of color come at the expense of while people's rights. But meat people claim it anyway.

The meat people may as well say:
"Wah! But I want to eat abused chickens and test household cleaners on rabbits! Wah! But I want to watch terrified monkeys dance around on TV! Wah! But I want to snort elephant tusks to make my penis larger. Wah! But I want to beat my dog and poison pigeons. Wah! But I want to skin foxes and minks alive and wear them. Wah! But I want to chase a pet pig around an enclosed area and shoot it with a handgun in a canned hunt. Wah! But I want to smuggle exotic birds into the US. Wah! But I want to sell live turtles on the street to children who will abuse and kill them. Wah! But I want to grind up baby chicks for petfood and fertilizer. Wah! But I want to watch small men ride horses around in a circle really fast. Wah! But I want to harpoon giant whales and slaughter dolphins. Wah! But I want to butcher wild kangaroos and buffaloes. Wah! Wah! Wah! Those animal rights people don't care about me and my rights! Wah!"

#20 Killing Babies

Many forms of meat that meat people consume are actually dead babies.

Young or baby animals are routinely slaughtered for human consumption. Furthermore, the practice of producing other animal products often results in killing babies.

Here are some examples of how meat people kill babies:

  • Veal & Dairy - Veal comes from dead calves. The babies are a byproduct of the dairy industry. If people stopped drinking milk, veal production would likely end.
  • Eggs - The male chicks in the egg industry are useless and so they are usually killed as babies. Often they are ground up alive, sometimes they are gassed, and other times they are smothered by each other when they're tossed into garbage bins.
  • Pork - Piglets are taken away from their mothers at an early age (2-3 weeks). As a result, many die right then. When they are about 6 months old, they are slaughtered. For perspective, a pig's natural lifespan is about 15 years.
  • Turkey - Turkeys naturally live 10-20 years, but they're usually slaughtered at younger than two years. Free-range can be even worse. They tend to be slaughtered at 14 and 25 weeks of age.
  • Chicken - Chickens are sometimes slaughtered as young as three weeks of age. By 14 weeks of age, nearly all chickens (caged as well as "free-range") are slaughtered. Naturally, they'd live much longer, up to 15 years.
  • Beef - Dairy cows are often slaughtered at about four years, sometimes while pregnant. Beef cattle are normally is slaughtered between 9 and 30 months of age. The average lifespan for a cow or bull is about 7 years.
  • Lamb - Lamb comes from baby sheep. US Lamb Grades: Baby Lamb or hothouse lamb (lambs slaughtered at between 6 and 8 weeks of age), Spring Lamb (between 3 and 5 months of age), Lamb (under one year of age), Mutton (Sheep over 1 year of age, typically slaughtered by 2 years of age). Sheep can live up to 15 years.
Since virtually all meat comes from dead baby animals, one can only conclude that meat people like killing babies. You may want to reconsider that omnivorous babysitter.

#19 Hormones

The majority of meat and dairy produced in the US has been produced using artificial hormones. Some of the hormones used to produce meat and dairy are: Oestradiol, Progesterone,Testosterone, Zeranol, Trenbolone, and Melengestrol.

The European Union’s Scientific Committee on Veterinary Measures Relating to Public Health has determined that growth hormones in beef production poses a potential risk to human health.

Growth hormones are in meat and diary, but the hormones are also excreted in cattle manure and enters the environment, sometimes contaminating water and harming fish and other wildlife.

Since people don't need to eat meat or dairy and thus don't need to use hormones to produce meat and dairy, one can only conclude that meat people like hormones.

#18 Hypocrisy

Gallup polls show that
"A quarter of Americans say animals deserve the same rights as humans, while almost all of the rest agree that animals should be given some protection from harm and exploitation."

Yet, meat people support this:

#17 Quitting Before They Start

A common refrain from meat people is, "I could never be vegetarian." Truth is, they've never tried.

Meat people don't give themselves enough credit. Of course they could be vegetarian. They just don't want to be.

But if they wanted to, like if it meant they'd win a million dollars, they sure could.

#16 Happy Meat

Many meat people love "humane meat" (aka "happy meat"). This is meat that meat people believe has been raised humanely. It doesn't really matter if the animal really lived a good life or not, what matters is that the meat people paid extra and believed the animal lived a good life.

Most meat people won't kill animals so they pay other people to do it for them. These meat people feel bad about hurting animals, but not bad enough to stop hurting animals. They get mad when they learn the realities about factory farming. So they try to buy organic, free range, "happy meat."

Instead of going vegan, many meat people will pay an extra $2 per pound or so because they can think they are making a difference with their consumer choice. The reality is, they aren't making much of a difference at all because "happy meat" is rarely actually happy.

#16 Forced Impregnation

This goes for milk people too, not just meat people. Meat people like forced impregnation.

Dairy cows are forcibly impregnated so that when they give birth, they will produce milk. But cows don't give milk forever after they've given birth, so they must be re-impregnated. Dairy cows in the US are often repeatedly impregnated in a continuous cycle of pregnancy and birth from the time they become fertile until the time they are slaughtered (often at 3 or 4 years, a fraction of their lifespan). In fact, some dairy cows are pregnant when slaughtered.

Many of the calves of dairy cows are slaughtered at younger than 5 months old for veal meat. Dairy cow's beef is cheap and is used in things like US school lunch programs. The dairy industry's main product is, you guessed it, dairy. So even though they make a profit from veal and from dairy cow beef, those are bi-products of the dairy industry, not the other way around. Milk is a big money-maker.

Pigs are forcibly impregnated to produce piglets. The female pigs are often kept in gestation crates that are only large enough for the pig to stand or lie down, not large enough to turn around. Commonly, when the piglets are only about six months old they are slaughtered for pork meat.

Since meat people like meat, like pork or veal, then they must like forced impregnation. And since milk people like milk, well, they must like forced impregnation, too.

#15 Lying

For some strange reason, there is a small group of meat people who call themselves vegetarians or vegans. You know the ones, they say:
"I'm a vegetarian. I'll have the salmon."
Either they are ignorant and don't really understand that being vegetarian means no eating meat (including fish, chicken, and other animals) or they are liars.

Given that people who call themselves vegetarian tend to be smart (source: High IQ Linked To Being Vegetarian), one should assume meat people who call themselves vegetarians are liars and are not ignorant.

#14 Carbon Monoxide

Meat people like their meat to look fresh. Carbon Monoxide packaging makes that happen.

Carbon Monoxide (CO) is commonly used in American meat and fish packaging to create a red color associated with freshness. Meat that has not been treated with Carbon Monoxide will naturally oxidize and change color (turn brown) after about 10 days or so. But animal flesh that has been treated with carbon monoxide in "modified atmosphere packaging" will retain a reddish color. This treatment can mask spoilage.

Meat people either don't know about the dangers of Carbon Monoxide or they don't care. Carbon Monoxide can cause fish to accumulate dangerous levels of scombrotoxin or histamine. Carbon Monoxide in meat and fish can mask a wide variety of pathogens including E. Coli and Salmonella.

There are other dangers from Carbon Monoxide as well. It pollutes the environment and poses serious health hazards and risk of death to workers who handle Carbon Monoxide.

This use of Carbon Monoxide is purely aesthetic and not necessary at all. In fact, because of the dangers it poses many countries ban this use of Carbon Monoxide. But since meat people want fresh-looking meat, American meat producers often use Carbon Monoxide.

The use of Carbon Monoxide doesn't look so fresh and tasty after all.

#13 Pesticides

Pesticides, heavy metals, and other toxins like mercury accumulate in the fat tissues of animals (including human animals). When people consume meat, poultry, and fish, they consume these accumulated toxins in much higher doses than would be possible if they consumed only plant foods.

The danger is serious: The US government advises pregnant woman and young children to avoid eating fish due to the high accumulation of mercury. Diet for a New America reports that:
  • Fewer than 1 out of every 250,000 slaughtered animals is tested for toxic residues
  • 99% of average American mother's milk contains significant levels of DDT
  • Only 8% of average American vegetarian mother's milk contains significant levels of DDT
The danger is real, but meat people don't avoid it. Could it be they actually like toxic food?

(PS "organic meat" doesn't necessarily mean the meat is pesticide-free. The US organic certification for meat, dairy, and eggs refers more to hormones and antibiotics than to pesticides. Organic meat can come from a cow who has been fed some pesticide-coated grains or even mercury-filled fish. Also please note, the word "natural" has no legal definition.)

#12 Delusion

Meat people love deluding themselves.

For example, most meat people like to believe animals raised for food live long, happy lives and are killed painlessly, but this couldn't be further from the truth. And even when meat people are confronted by the truth, for example, the video of slaughterhouse workers torturing downed dairy cows and forcing them into the kill box with forklifts, even then meat people often still refuse to give up meat.

Meat people's delusions are evidenced in their language. For example, meat people often find it "shocking" or "deliberately offensive" when vegans use proper terminology for animal products, such as "dead, rotting flesh" or "puss-ridden secretions." Meat people love deluding themselves into believing meat isn't flesh and that milk isn't a secretion.

Another common delusion meat people love is that an animal-based diet is healthier than a plant-based diet. Meat people love worrying about protein, iron, calcium, and other nutrients. But they only worry about them for vegans and vegetarians. They assume that their animal-based diet is healthy, regardless of how much excess fat, cholesterol, sugar, and sodium it contains. or how much it lacks vitamin C, water, fiber, and variety.

Meat people just conveniently ignore the fact that nonmeat people tend to live longer than meat people. They delude themselves and think that consuming meat on a daily basis is a good idea.

Not only do meat people blind themselves to the truth, they often use blinding devices on animals. Whether it's blinders on horses in Central Park, greyhound racing dogs, or lack of sunlight to factory farmed food animals, meat people love blinding others.

When dealing with deluded meat people be sure not to make sudden movements, loud noises, or overwhelm them with information. They are easily emotionally flooded and may become aggressive when their delusions begin to dissolve.

#11 MRSA and Other Deadly Bacteria

Some Canadian pork tested positive for the MRSA (methicillin-resistant Staphylococcus aureus). The exact rates vary. Between 1% to 33% of the pork was contaminated with MRSA.

The results are similar to tests done on chicken in the Netherlands and Japan.

Dr. Scott Weese, meat person and lead researcher who found this deadly bacteria, loves his meat so much he said:
"I'm not going to stop eating pork because of this," reports The Star.
In addition to MRSA, many meat products also contain e coli and salmonella. Animal products are much more likely to contain deadly bacteria than plant products.

One can only conclude that meat people actually like deadly bacteria.

If you are ever in contact with a meat person, be sure to wash your hands thoroughly afterwards.

#10 Worrying About Protein

Meat people love worrying about protein.

Many meat people tend to ignore the protein building blocks (amino acids) in plant based foods and think protein is only available in animal based foods (meat).

Many meat people like asking nonmeat people, "Where do you get your protein?" When nonmeat people reply that getting enough protein is rarely a problem for anyone who eats a variety of plant based foods and in fact, most Americans eat too much protein, the meat people are often confused or in disbelief.

The millions of vegetarians and vegans throughout the world and throughout history prove proteins are easily available in nonmeat diets. In fact, most nonmeat people are healthier and get more nutrients than most meat people.

But meat people would rather get their protein (and many other nutrients) second-hand, that is, filtered through the flesh of an animal.

#9 Diarrhea

Despite the fact that the majority of food-borne illness results from contaminated meat, meat people still love meat.

In fact, contaminated meat is so prevalent that meat people are advised by the US government to carefully cook all meat, so as to kill the bacteria present in the feces within the meat product.

Meat people love their meat so much they are willing to eat shit to have it.

Not only are they willing to eat shit for their meat, they are also willing to get the shits for their meat. Contaminants like salmonella, e coli, and other dangerous bacteria and toxins found in meat can produce diarrhea in adults (and can have much worse consequences for children, the sick, and the elderly).

Moreover, the Standard American Diet (SAD), which is high in meat, doesn't contain enough fiber to keep the stools of meat people nice and firm, thus resulting in diarrhea. SAD meat people need more fiber.

If you ever have to buy a meat person a gift, consider getting them a fiber-rich fruit basket.

#8 Whining About How Hard Veganism Is

Meat people love whining about how hard it is to be a nonmeat person.

Even though most meat people have never spent any significant amount of time exploring nonmeat lifestyles, they like to act as though they are experts on the subject and assume all kinds of things about nonmeat people.

Some unsolicited phrases meat people love to say to nonmeat people:
"I could never be a vegan."
"You're so brave."
"But what about _?"
"I love _ too much."
"You have so much self-control."

Meat people assume it's extremely difficult to not eat meat. Apparently meat people are slaves to their taste buds and are incapable of changing their habits. Ever. They also seem to hate nutrition, cooking, and vegetables.

So, how should you deal with meat people who assume it's extremely difficult to not eat meat and who whine about it?
Just change the subject. Whiners are annoying.

#7 Diabetes

Meat people have higher rates of diabetes than nonmeat people.

Given the statements from the American Dietetic Association and Dietitians of Canada that say vegetarians have lower rates of type 2 diabetes* and the multitude of research that has found that a vegan diet is better at treating diabetes than "traditional methods" like medication and a meat-inclusive diet, one can only conclude that meat people actually like diabetes.

*Vegetarians also have lower rates of death from ischemic heart disease, lower blood cholesterol levels, lower blood pressure, lower rates of hypertension, and prostate and colon cancer.

#6 Force Feeding

Whenever meat people disagree with nonmeat people about meat, meat people like to say the nonmeat people "shouldn’t be imposing their beliefs on others" or that nonmeat people "want to shove their beliefs down everyone else’s throats."

Meat people conveniently ignore the irony. For example, it's meat people who literally shove things down other's throats. Be it foie gras, veal, or other meat for meat people, many animals raised for meat are regularly force fed.

Many meat people view vocal vegans as religious zealots. When they encounter a nonmeat person some meat people react as though they've been cold-called late at night by a long-winded and annoying telemarketer. Most meat people view veganism the same way they view living animals: something to be extinguished so that they may more easily enjoy meat.

Basically, what a meat person really means when they say nonmeat people "shouldn’t be imposing their beliefs on others" or that nonmeat people "want to shove their beliefs down everyone else’s throats" is that meat people don't want to engage in a discussion about meat morality.

#5 Claiming Vegans Aren't Funny

Meat people love making fun of vegans. They make jokes that they think are so witty and smart, but the vegans have usually heard the jokes before. And they're usually not so witty or smart.

Some examples of these kinds of unfunny jokes:
"She don't eat meat, but she sure likes the bone."
"Moooooooo!" or "Oink, oink" as they eat meat.
"But what about the plants!?!?!?!"

Meat people expect vegans to:
a) laugh at unfunny jokes and
b) laugh at tired, unfunny jokes.
When vegans don't laugh, meat people usually claim that vegans are unfunny and then the meat people often get mad.

If you are ever dealing with an unfunny meat person you have a couple choices:

1. Ignore them. Meat people who make unfunny jokes are trying to get your attention and approval. Don't give it to them. Be interested in your own navel if you have to.

2. Out funny them.